News broke yesterday that late night lefty King of Smarm, David Letterman, has been the victim of an attempted extortion scheme. Letterman admitted to his audience that he's been taking off his World Wide Pants and putting his pecker on the payroll. This revelation was met with tittering and nervous laughter as his fans kept trying to figure out where the punch line was. It wasn't clear how many staffers he'd been diddling or for how long but it was obvious from the statement it was more than a one time indiscretion.
Dave seems to find the humor in other peoples foibles and misery. So if you'll allow me one moment as I muster up some sympathy for Mr. Letterman's embarrassment. (HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!! Boning the help....HAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!.....Just like his hero,
Bill Clinton...HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!...That new wife not enough for 'ya? ...HAHAHAHAHAHA!...Boy, that Sarah Palin sure makes a fool out of herself a lot, doesn't she? HAHAHAHAHA!)
What an asswipe.
One last thing. Letterman hates the Palins so I just want to ask one question. You have a choice of two couples to make a sex swap with for the night. You pick. The one on the top. Or the one on the bottom.
Yeah. Me too. Personally, I think Dave would make the same pick.
Nice to have you back. Tell your friends.
ReplyDeleteFG,
ReplyDeleteI have some funereal humor for you. The next time you are making like you give a shit,you know, standing over the casket next to a family member with that well practiced, hang dog look on your puss, you can utter one of these lines and see how they go over:
1."He is one of those people who was enormously improved by death." -- H. H. Munro
2."There's nothing wrong with him that reincarnation won't cure."
- Jack E. Leonard
3. "I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great pleasure." --Clarence Darrow
4. "She got her good looks from her father. He's a plastic surgeon." -- Groucho Marx
5."That four-hundred-dollar suit on him looks like socks on a rooster." -- Earl Long
tbird,
ReplyDeleteHa ha. Those are all classics. Thanks for reminding me of them. I'll save them for an appropriate time.
BTW we call that "hang dog" look Funeral Face.
TFG