Monday, June 27, 2011

Next thing you'll tell me is Mrs. Cleaver did double penetration porn.

Florence Henderson...Back in the day.
Pretty MILF-y.  I'd have given her a tumble. 

Florence Henderson, beloved TV mom on the popular 70's sitcom The Brady Bunch, has revealed in her soon to be released autobiography that she was cheating on her husband in the 60's.  Mom Brady!!??  Yep.  Doing the beast with two backs outside of the martial bed.  Oh, my.  And what makes this the best Too Much Information dump of all time?  One of her one-night-stand fuck buddies was former mayor of New York, John Lindsay.  John Lindsay, for those who don't know the history, was the Democrat mayor upon whom's watch the City That Never Sleeps took it's long slide into decay, welfare dependence, drugs and street crime.  Think Death Wish as a documentary.  And...the sordid story doesn't end there.  The morning after the encounter Florence discovered a little gift from the mayor.  Well, actually a whole bunch of them.  I'm talking about the little black bugs that crawl around in your pubic hair.  (Pubic hair, or as I used to joke in my case, public hair, is the hair that grows around your genital area.  I say this to all you young people who have never experienced it since you've been shaving your junk since you were 12.)

Crabs, as they were known, were quite common in the hippie/road musician days.  I knew a chick that got them on her eyelashes from blowing a bass player.  Hahahahahaha.  You could even set them on the porcelain toilet tank, put a lit cigarette behind them and make them race.  Yours truly was infested couple of times.  But, rest assured, I got mine from a toilet seat.  A little Pyrinate A-200, a hot shower and a fine tooth comb and you were good to party after the gig.

  Crab louse.  Up close and personal. 
Hanging on to your pube for dear life. 

At least in her autobiography Florence "Carol Brady" Henderson lays to rest the rumor that she boinked Barry Williams, the young actor who played her son, Greg.  Thank god for that.  Any more on Florence's sex life and I think my head would explode.

This will not prevent me from reading her book if more sex stories leak out, however.

Update: My brother The Conservatarian has taken me to school that Lindsay was a RINO Republican when he was NYC mayor and the crab giver to Florence Henderson.  He then converted to his true Democrat self for an unsuccessful run at the presidency.  I regret the error.  This in no way negates the the axiom: If you lie down with politicians, you'll come up with fleas.

1 comment:

  1. John Lindsay was a RINO when he was mayor of New York. He "converted" to his true Democrat religion so he could run for president as a Democrat in 1972 (he did not get the nomination).

    Exit question: Why does California work so hard at out doing New York in rate of decline?