Wednesday, September 23, 2009

Maybe in my memoir I'll reveal my decade long necrophilic affair with my dead grandmother.

Mackenzie Phillips, for those of you born after the 80's, is the daughter of "Papa" John Phillips, founding member, songwriter and all around driving force behind the 60's mega-hit making group The Mamas and the Papas.  He was also a unquenchable drug addict and alcoholic of awe inspiring proportions.  I remember reading his autobiography, Papa John, and thinking that he made Hunter Thompson look like Carrie Nation.  (She was a world famous temperance scold for those of you who slept through history class.)  Papa John died in 2001 at age 65 which was probably long past his expiration date considering the years of prodigious drug and alcohol abuse which continued even after a liver transplant.

Mackenzie has her own just released memoir titled High on Arrival where she talks about how she was also a raging drug addict.  Like father, like daughter and not big news since she was publicly fired from her sitcom One Day At A Time a couple of times in the early 80's for being so loaded she was passing out at rehearsals.  She remained tabloid fodder for some time after that as she went in and out and in and out of rehab.

So how does a has-been actress/singer with no career bring a little buzz to yet another (yawn) drugged out celebrity memoir.  How indeed?  Well, how about revealing to the world that during the 80's you consensually fucked your dad for the better part of the decade.  Talk about pegging the needle on the yuck meter.  Whoo boy, that sure got folks to take notice.  As a matter of fact, it's been the hottest topic of the interwebs all day.  Half-sister Chynna backs up the story, while step-momma Michelle says Mackenzie is about as full of shit as someone who's spent most of her life comatose on narcotics can be.

John and Mackenzie.  A love story.

So.  We come down to two possibilities.  One, the story is bullshit.  If it's bullshit it's about as cynical and desperate as you can get and the sign of a world class money grubbing famewhore.  Or two, the story is true.  In that case why in the hell would you want the world to know that you were banging your father?  I know this is a confessional culture, but holy shit, keep this kind of depravity between you and your therapist.  I know that it's hard for celebrities in recovery to be completely anonymous but shouldn't it be possible-and wise- to keep some things to yourself?  Or is Mackenzie Phillips so delusional that she thinks she is helping some vast throng of women that have been willingly schtupping their daddies for ten years.


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