In Haddon Township, a 17 year old student took a dump in another kid's soda during shop class. Even the dumb fuck jokers that ended up in shop class back in my day never pulled anything this simpleminded. The victim took a sip of the poopy potion then immediately spat it out to the great merriment of his fellow lunkheads.
The cops and prosecutors were less amused with the coprophiliac cretin who eventually pled down from aggravated assault to a count of tampering with a food product. Tampering? That's a nice way of saying you gave a guy a shit shake to drink.
Ehhhh...So I took a shaduke in some douchebags drink.
Whaaaaatt!!?? Is that a big fuckin' deal here?
The judge's sentence was appropriate. Probation and community service which I'm sure this bozo is no stranger to. But then the judge threw in the kicker. Write a 1000 word essay on why it's unhealthy to ingest fecal matter.
A thousand word essay? For this imbecile that's going to be a life sentence.
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