Tuesday, May 4, 2010

Boobs so big no stripper pole could possibly hold her.

From the always informative Mail Online (UK).

Julia Manihauri, 29, of Peru had a big problem.  Well, two of them actually.  After the birth of her third son Julia's breasts kept growing and growing and growing until her chichis became gigundous bazongas.  How enormous?  You remember the Hindenberg?  That dirigible that crashed in New Jersey all those years back?  About like that.  Seriously, though, her bra is a N cup.  Who even knew there was such a thing?  Julia's boobage reached the point where she was bedridden.  And not just because her husband loved them so much that he was on top of her all the time having a ride.  They were so big that when she would try to stand up she would feel faint.  Sort of like your humble narrator.  When I get fully aroused so much blood goes to my giggle stick I get a little woozy.  (Mrs. Funeral Guy: I wish!)

Julia Manihauri.  
Giving Heidi Montag big ideas. 

The breasts became like that old horror movie The Blob, getting to the point where Julia's life was in danger.  Doctors diagnosed Julia with Bilateral Gynecomastia, a condition where the mammary glands just go shit nuts.  There were only two options for Julia.  Centerfold of the Year in Juggs magazine or reduction surgery.

Julia chose life and the docs (damn 'em) cut off 35 pounds of lady flesh until our dear little 5 foot tall gal was a more manageable 34B.  The sound of her sobbing husband could be heard in the next town.

Wouldn't bother me none.  I'm an ass and leg man.

Update:  The race is on.  Heidi Montag must have already seen the picture of Julia.  Life and Style is reporting that Heidi is scheduling surgery for bigger boom booms.

2 comments:

  1. Cowabonga, there is no artful segue I can think of to get from those massive mammaries to this, but WTF...

    I live in Arizona. I will have to hit the mattresses soon:It is called Machete and it opened yesterday!
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W8cCzltPD6Y&feature=related
    An instant bad classic with a dream cast: DeNiro, Lindsay Lohan, Cheech Marin,Don Johnson, and Steven Segal. The director has included a special message for Arizona it was reported here: http://www.heatvisionblog.com/2010/05/machete-trailer-arizona-cinco-de-mayo.html
    I moved from LA to get away from this kind of wackiness. I should have done a little research...

    ReplyDelete
  2. Buenos noches, Senor tbird. Que pasa? I want to move to AZ actually. Land of open carry and unlicensed conceal carry. Muy bueno. Funny trailer. So glad Obama was elected. The nation is healed.

    ReplyDelete