Thursday, May 26, 2011

Discrimination against women with big cans? We cannot let this stand.

Lawyers in civil cases will do anything for an edge, but Chicago attorney Dmitry N. Feofanov is being accused of using his boobalicious paralegal to distract the jury.  Opposing attorney Thomas Gooch says the woman's sole purpose "is to draw the attention of the jury away from the relevant proceedings."  Well, I should hope so.  Mr. Feofanov insists that Daniella Atencia is a qualified paralegal and he has every right to have her assist him in his case.  I wonder if when opposing counsel makes an objection she gives a little shimmy so they bobble and bounce to further confuse the jurors.

"Personally, I like large breasts."  Said Attorney Gooch, but added, "However, I object to somebody I don't think is a qualified paralegal sitting at the counsel table - when there's already two lawyers there - dressed in such a fashion as to call attention to herself."  In the photo below she seems to be dressed professionally.  (Dammit!)  Hey Dimitry, if you really want to distract the jury let me get Daniela into some outfits.  Because if this is the best you can do you are really a rank amateur in the trollop dressing department.

Dmitry and Daniela.  The Boris and Natasha 
of the Chicago legal community. 
I can't really tell about her tits, 
but those sure are some big-ass glasses. 

"Personally, I like large breasts" Really?  I can't believe Mr. Gooch actually said that out loud.  Judge?  Can I get a ruling on that?   One might wonder if it's the jury being distracted or Attorney Gooch.

And one more thing.  Do we not have enough of our own lawyers or was it essential to import Dmitry N. Feofanov here from Russia?

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