Saturday, April 24, 2010

I think we finally have the answer as to how that Madoff scam went unnoticed for so long.

This thing has gone so viral that I was hesitant to post about it.  For a guy like me this story is the proverbial fish in a barrel, but what the hell.  It has two of my favorite elements for a story of fuckery gone wild.  Porn and government employees.  In this case the Securities and Exchange Commission.  You know, the agency that fiddled (with their puds) while Wall Street burned.

I'm gonna link to the Daily News story because of all the sites I checked they win the prize for the most puns and double entendres.  My hat is off to staff writer Leo Standora for working in SEC=SEX, titillating, booty, cracks, probes, spread and full-blown into his story.  Also, they posted a photo of a broad with nice titties in nothing but a bra in front of her keyboard.  I think I should send these guys my resume'.

Back to your tax dollars at work.  I won't rehash the whole thing but the whole damn story would be hysterically funny if it hadn't had a part in the collapse of our economy.  One senior attorney apparently spent up to eight hours a day porn surfing.  Eight hours!!?? Isn't that in work time like...all day?  (Where do you think you work, pudwhacker?  A funeral home?)  And most of these wankers were not your average, bored, low-level cubicle drones.  Seventeen of these fuckwits were sucking the taxpayer dry (see, I can double entendre, too) to the tune of up to $222,000 a year.

Investigators are looking into whether government computers 
were also used to download Kitty Porn.

Jenna Goudreau from Forbes (who judging from her photo is shit hot, by the way) is shocked! shocked! that one of the female employees was actually involved in something so skeevy  The accountant, who I'm guessing was the most popular gal in the office, tried to access online porn 1800 times in two weeks and had 600 explicit photos on her work laptop.  Oh, behaaaave!!!  There is no truth to the rumor that Bill Clinton and John Edwards are both lobbying Obama for an appointment to head (tee hee) the agency.

When you get to the end of it all this is less of a story about porn than it is a story that proves that you don't have to be a hard working stiff to get a government job.

But it helps to be a jack-off.

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