Man literally lays pipe.

From the always readable UK Sun.

Some doofus numbnuts from Britain got his cock stuck in a length of pipe and it had to have it removed with a grinding tool.  Frankly, I think the fact that he was grinding his tool into a pipe was the cause of his troubles.

I like how the story notes that the man failed to explain how his turgid member found it's way into the pipe.

Let's put on our Sherlock hats and see if we can use our powers of deduction, shall we?

1)  He's a Brit.  Ergo, he's drunk.

2) He's a guy.  Ergo, he's horny.

Deduction:  He looks bleary-eyed at a length of pipe and sees a pussy.  Case closed.

 Soon as I'm done here 
I'm gonna find me something to fuck, Mate.