Weiner Pulls Out: America ejaculates and sighs in relief.

That's it.  Lights out.  The circus is packing up the tent as the star attraction goes into retirement.  Our long (tee hee) national nightmare is over.

Anthony, Anthony, Anthony. 

This is one you should have phoned in. 

I'm wondering.  Is there a law somewhere that when a disgraced figure is forced to resign he has to do it publicly?  Because if there isn't why the fuck would Anthony Weiner get up in front of the cameras one more time?  Has his humiliation not been enough yet?  He even thanked his parents and mentioned his brother by name.  Ouch, thanks for the shout out, Bro.  How about this?  A simple statement read by a staffer as his final duty before he hits the unemployment line.  "I hereby resign my position as the Representative of the ninth district of New York in the United States House of Representatives.  Effective Immediately.  I have been proud to serve you.  Thank you and God bless America."  Period.  Wouldn't that have been better?

If Weiner had done it my way, he would have been spared the heckling from the Howard Stern whack pack.  "Pervert!" and "Are you more than 7 inches?" and "Are you fully erect right now?"  Holy shit, even I cringed a bit at the pile-on.  Weiner denied himself a low-key dignified exit because he can't stay away from those damn cameras.  (Silly me.  Dignified, low-key, Anthony Weiner and cameras in the same sentence.  What the hell am I thinking?)  At least he didn't pull out his turgid dick and cup his balls as a crowning farewell.  And thank God he didn't have the little wifey standing there with him looking like someone in a hostage video.  Speaking of Huma, how would you like to have been a fly on the wall when she got home?  Can you imagine the sick feeling in the pit of Anthony's stomach when he saw those headlights as she turned in the driveway.

One of the stupidest things I've heard from women commentators on the subject of Anthony Weiner goes something like this, "Why would he do something so stupid and so reckless?  His wife Huma is so beautiful and accomplished."  Are women really that dumb when it comes to male sexuality?  Axiom #1.  It doesn't have to be better.  It just has to be different.  (Even stipulating that Anthony Weiner is not sexually normal, has severe exhibitionist tendencies and god only knows what other kinds of kink.)

One last thing somewhat off the topic.  I was watching some of the pre-game anticipation and time killing banter on Fox News this morning.  Kirsten Powers was on the phone to comment on the upcoming news conference.  She's a good looking liberal chick, but not necessarily a party line spouting Kool-Aid drinker.  She's also pretty smart and a columnist for the New York Post and a Fox News contributor.  And, in case you didn't know, she dated The Weiner for 3 months, so she knows him and can probably answer the "more than 7 inches" question.  So here is the howler that came from the yap of Kirsten Powers.  She was commenting on how his behavior was so disrespectful to women, bordering on sexual harassment and in the case of Ginger Lee, (Paraphrasing) "Just because she's a pornstar/stripper doesn't mean she deserved to be talked to this way, because she genuinely seemed to be interested in politics."  What she is referring to is Weiner talking about his "package" in his emails with the pornstar.

Putting aside the "normal" women the congressman was trolling, let's focus on the pornstar since Kirsten Powers brought her up to accent the sexual harassment aspect.   OK.  I'm about the take the giant leap into the big muddy puddle of political incorrectness.  Kirsten.  Dear, dear Kirsten. You've apparently sucked up so much feminist theory that you've learned nothing about men.  (I once told Mrs. Funeral Guy, "If you broads ever figure out what we men are really thinking, you'll run screaming from the room.")

I'm going to make this really simple.  Anthony Weiner finds out that a pornstar is following him on Twitter.  (Yes, I know that she and her harpy attorney Gloria Allred erased the pornstar appellation and now go with "featured dancer".  Puhleeze.)  Ginger Lee wants to play policy wonk with the congressman.  Anthony Weiner is a man and a horny, creepy one to boot.  I'm sure he Googled Ginger Lee and caught a few video performances.  I sure have.  Now Ginger Lee chose her occupation.  Much like you chose yours, Kirsten.  If I followed you on Twitter I would be expecting serious political discourse.  If I followed Ginger Lee, I would be expecting sexual intercourse discourse.  It's like this.  When you choose as your profession a job in which you suck cock, take cock up the ass, and ride cock reverse cowgirl in front of a camera, can you really be surprised when a male wants to talk to you about his cock?  The male brain processes a pornstar and thinks whore, which strictly defined she is.  She fucks not for love but for money.  To an Anthony Weiner (and most men, frankly) Ginger Lee isn't a person, she's a pornstar.  She certainly deserves basic human rights such as the right not to be raped or harassed on the street for being a pornstar, but from the male population she ain't gonna get respect for her brain and her opinions on political issues.  My point is, you can't bone three guys, look into a camera and lick cum off your fingers, then expect men to want discuss health care policy with you.  Does this come as a shock?  When you purposely present yourself to the world in a certain way, don't be offended when the world takes you for what you've presented.  It's like when a person covers his face with tattoos, has huge piercings all over his body then when he gets the inevitable gawking he screams, "Hey, what the fuck are you looking at?"

I've gone a little far afield here, I know.  I have to admit that I almost felt sorry for The Weiner today.  I don't think I've ever seen somebody crash and burn so spectacularly in my life.  God knows I've had a really fun time writing about this with my schadenfreude level at Defcon 1.  At the same time, I'm a sympathetic person.  (Hey, stop laughing.  I'm in the sympathy business.)  The problem for Anthony Weiner was that the guy was such an asshole even his own party didn't like him much.  He was so inclined to ascribe bad motives to those who didn't agree with his left wing politics, that at the end, those on the other side couldn't help but watch his flameout with a certain amount of glee.

So.  What will become of The Weiner?  I just heard on the news that Larry Flynt is offering him a job.  Sounds like a good fit to me.  And by hanging around with Larry Flynt he might run into Ginger Lee.  They could talk politics.  Or whatever.

Showing more moral clarity than Senator Chuck Shumer, pornstar Ginger Lee says Weiner should resign.

Pornstar Ginger Lee appeared with her famewhore attorney Gloria Allred in the hilariously appropriate setting of the Milton Berle room of the Friar's Club today.  The topic on the table?  Her complete innocence on her part of the Weiner Wanger Sexting Scandal.  The big news is that she stated flat out that Weiner "asked me to lie."  That spells trouble no matter how you slice Weiner's baloney.

It's not easy finding a picture of Ginger Lee that 

I can post on the family friendly Funeral Guy blog.  

Ms. Lee who says she's a former pornstar, now bills herself as a "featured dancer" in "nightclubs".  Oh, dear.  We are becoming delicate with our language aren't we now?  For those of you who are uninitiated in these matters, a "featured dancer" is a stripper/lap dancer and the "nightclub" is a strip joint.  You become a "featured dancer" after you've sucked a plentitude of dick and had your bunghole repeatedly reamed on enough porn DVD's that the horny and the curious will attend a live strip club performance so they can see your vagina up close and personal.  This is not the Alvin Ailey Dance Troupe or the fucking ballet we're talking about here.

Ms. Lee stated that she and The Weiner exchanged nearly 100 emails and Twitter messages for 3 months.  The demure little flower of womanhood said all the communications of a sexual nature were started by the congressman and when they came her way she averted her shy gaze and quickly changed the subject.  But Weiner kept trying to steer the conversation back to his Weiner.  Some of the messages from the congressman were as follows.

"I have wardrobe demands too. I need to highlight my package."


"Alright, my package and I are not going to beg." 


You aren't giving my package due credit."

But Ginger Lee didn't want to talk about Weiner's package.  That would be too much like she was at work.  You have to understand, Ginger is not your average blonde porn professional cum receptacle.  No way, Jose.  She wanted to talk policy.  Ms. Lee is particularly interested in the politics of Planned Parenthood and health care.  Stands to reason.  What good is a pregnant pornstar/stripper/featured dancer and who is going to pay for the treatment of Ginger's various and sundry STD's?

I could be wrong, of course, but I'm beginning to sense a pattern with Representative Weiner.  He is obsessed with his cock. (Insightful, I know.)  In all the exchanges we've seen so far it's always about him and his cock.  Rock hard, my package, big and fat, rock hard cock.  In photos, what's he doing?  Showing his boner, grabbing his junk, cupping his balls.  Outside of one comment to the blackjack dealer about her pussy being tight and wet, he never says, "Hey, I like your tits." or "Wow, you got one fine ass." or "Those legs would look really good wrapped around my waist".   You know, normal guy shit.  I can understand a horny dude wanting to get some action.  Maybe an intern blowjob and some splooge on a dress.  The usual politician quickie sex.  But this shit that Weiner pulled (tee hee) is just way too weird.  Mark my words, Anthony Weiner will be arrested some time in the future for walking around a Middle School with his penis hanging out of his fly.

Gloria Allred and her pornstar traveling circus hit town on the day the presumably angry and embarrassed Mrs. Weiner returns from her road trip.  Would I like to be Anthony Weiner right now?  Not for all the sluts on Facebook.

Update:  The New York Post is reporting that Ginger Lee will be back on the pole at the Pink Pony in Atlanta after her star turn in the Weiner saga today.  Bitch gottsa' get paid, yo!

Meet the press or meet your mom, 

a good fuckslut can dress properly when she has to. 

If a porn star messages you back couldn't you call it a Twat Tweet?

My approach to the stuff I get into on this blog is usually what my approach to groupies used to be.  Hit it and quit it.  (Exceptions made for the never endingly salacious and amusing, i.e. Tiger Woods.)

I don't want to become All Weiner-All The Time, since there are a lot of sites that are following the tech trail of this like the Cyber Sherlock Holmes that I could never be.  As you know my usual specialty is dick jokes.

Ladies and Gentlemen, Ms. Ginger Lee.

One of the few photos I could find 

that had all her lady bits covered.

(Or didn't have a penis in the picture.) 

Anyway, porn star Ginger Lee claims that she got a Direct Message from The Wiener (but not the famous picture, poor thing).  Now people can say anything they want so I'm just noting this as part of the passing poon and peenie picture parade of this particular scandal.

Here are the screen shots.

Whereas a follower of Ms. Lee asks the obvious question:

A Google search of Ginger Lee treated me to some fine videos of her having sex for a series done by a gentleman who goes by the sobriquet Mr. Cameltoe. (Yes, she has one and I will admit it is quite fetching.)   I also turned up the usually gangbangs, some bondage and fetish and Ginger with a cum splattered face.  Pretty ho-hum as this kind of shit goes.  (Aren't you glad I research this stuff so you don't have to?)

Ginger also has a blog titled Ginger Lee's Guide to Life & Other Important Stuff.  I didn't go too far into it but it looks like she mostly answers fan's questions.  She doesn't come off as completely unintelligent, although being a "fangirl" of Anthony Weiner does make one wonder.  (Although in fairness, I would assume that most porn stars probably lean Democrat.)  I'm curious since she does mention feminism (along with stripping) on her "What I'm about" page, if she advises young women to follow her path into the porn trade.  There are some feminists that think it is "empowering" to have yourself filmed blowing three guys at the same time.  Even I'll admit I find that brand of feminism to be an interesting concept.

Which brings us back to the congressman, who according to Ginger is like Buddha.  (If your idea of Buddha is a twerpy left-wing ranting politician who seems to spend way too much time Tweeting.)  One of two things is true.  Either he DM'd Ginger Lee or he didn't.  If he did, he's pretty reckless.  If he didn't and Ginger is just having a bizarre fantasy, then it's just another log on the gossip fire.

And one more thing for Mrs. Weiner to wrap her head around this weekend.

"I'm sorry.  Ms. Lee will have no further comment."