Rip Torn auditioning for a new starring role...on A&E's Intervention.

Elmore "Rip" Torn.

Ripped up and Torn up.

Holy shit, Batman.  What the hell was Rip Torn thinking?  The actor, whose real name is Elmore, was arrested in his hometown of Salisbury, CT the other night in the local bank "highly intoxicated" and in possession of a loaded revolver.

The Ripster (did you know his real name was Elmore?  I didn't.) was also arrested in 2004, 2007 and 2008 for drunk driving offenses.

Hey, Elmore...er...I mean Rip.  Will you take a little advice from an old ex booze hound?  You're 78 years old, dude.  I mean... I've gotten myself into a lot of drunken escapades.  But they usually involved a woman or several women that I probably should have stayed away from.  As fucked up as I've ever been I've never gone into a bank with a loaded gun.  If you're gonna get that shit-faced, stay home.

Elmore.  Get some help.  We'd all like to see Men in Black III one day.

Update: Rip is off to rehab.  We at The Funeral Guy wish him luck in his recovery.